Taco Bell - Chicken Cantina Burrito

Got a haircut and there was a Taco Bell nearby so I ate.  I wanted something a little lighter...huge sign for the new cantina burrito so I ordered it along with a potato taco.

While I'm completely aware Taco Bell (and really any fast food chain) does a ton of doctoring to get their food to look delicious in menu pictures, this was pretty sad.  The picture of the burrito on the menu looked more like a fresh salad in a tortilla - it looked like what I wanted to eat! Yes!

Cantina Burrito, looks good!

What I ended up eating was just a bunch of mush in a tortilla for about $5. 

I should have known better.  This was probably the worst burrito I've ever had.  A mish-mash of standard Taco Bell ingredients but WITH A TINY SCOOP OF BLACK BEANS OOOH SO UPSCALE.

And while I actually like standard Taco Bell ingredients in other forms (see: other reviews), this I did not.

 

Fat + salt rating: 7/10

 Taste rating: 4/10

Texture rating: Mush/10

Taco Bell - Doritos Locos Taco

I'm probably not the only person in existence to think of a Doritos taco.  I did when I was a young kid knocking down taco after taco while eating Doritos with them.  If these came out when I was 12 I would've probably inhaled them.

So how are they? They're exactly what you expect - a taco bell taco with a doritos flavored shell.  It was good, the only negative seemed to be that the shell wasn't as crunchy as the normal shell.

Fat rating: 4.5/10

Salt rating: 5.5/10

Taste rating: 6/10

Taco Bell - Crunchwrap Supreme

After being bugged, I gave in and tried one.  I got shredded cheese instead of gross nacho cheese, and no sour cream.  This may be another case of Taco Bell gaining favor that they've lost from me over the years.  I'm a fan of mexican food because of all the textures in one bite, and this wrap almost fully delivered.  The grilled tortilla containing beef, cheese, and a tostada shell acting as a barrier for the lettuce and tomato (so they don't get all nasty).  I'm going to get this with beans in it next time, because it is the only texture/flavor missing.

Fat rating: 6/10

Salt rating: 7.5/10

Taste rating: 6/10

CHICKEN TACO SALAD SHOWDOWN - Taco Bell vs. Del Taco

I've been to both of these places countless times, but have not tried these items until NOW.  Let's get down to BUSINESS.  I got no sour cream on both.

Taco Bell's salad was bottom-ed with rice and beans. As I recall the beans had some red sauce on them.  The stem-y taco bell lettuce was ample on this salad (no shit, it's a salad).  The grilled chicken was the salty white meat chicken I've grown accustomed to, along with tomatoes and cheese.  I didn't touch the ranch it came with because it was like liquid fat, and the chips were like a thicker, crappier Tostito's.  Taco Bell's chips are bad.

Fat rating: 4.5/10 (w/ chips, no ranch)

Salt rating: 6.5/10

Taste rating: 6/10

Del Taco's salad was about a dollar cheaper.  It did not contain any rice (Del Taco is really weird about rice, barely any of their menu items have it), but the other ingredients were similar.  The beans were red sauced, there was less lettuce than the Taco Bell salad (not as stem-y too), the chicken is not white meat but tasty;  a little too salty perhaps.  The tomatoes were standard, but paired with the guacamole sauce it created a good combo.  The salad as you can see was contained in a flour tortilla shell.

Fat rating: 6/10

Salt rating: 7.5/10

Taste rating: 7/10

WINNER: DEL TACO

Taco Bell - Double Decker and Chicken Enchilada Burrito

I am fully aware that Taco Bell's food does not look appetizing at all.  My love affair with the food ended awhile ago.  One of my taco mistresses was the Double Decker, which I've mentioned before.  I finally went to a Taco Bell not on campus a few days ago after my internship.  I got the taco shielded by a flour tortilla and kept together with a bean adhesive.  It was devoured as usual, for some reason they never get old.  It has a plethora of tastes/textures in one bite: chewy, crunchy, smooth, crisp, salty, meaty. 

Fat rating: 5/10

Salt rating: 6/10

Taste rating: 7/10

The chicken enchilada burrito is something I remember really liking back a few years ago.  It's different but not really - a chicken grilled stuft burrito with red sauce instead of pico de gallo and sour cream instead of the jalapeño sauce.  Of course I got no sour cream, shit is nasty.  The burrito was very good.  The mild red sauce was light and gave a great flavor to the burrito.  It complemented the cheese and rice well.  Easily one of, if not the best Taco Bell gimmick.

Fat rating: 5/10

Salt rating: 8/10

Taste rating: 7/10

Taco Bell Steak MEGA REVIEW

My second MEGA REVIEW, this one will be about 3 steak products from Taco Bell.  As I've stated, I'm not a big fan of the steak in one of my TB reviews, but it's ok once in a while as a break from chicken gorditas.

First the steak taquitos, these were pretty boring.  I'm not a big fan of taquitos and quesadillas because they're just lacking in the texture department.  Melted cheese and meat in a tortilla can only take you so far. 

Fat rating 5/10

Salt rating 7/10

Taste rating 5.5/10

Next, the grilled stuft burrito.  My chicken grilled stuft burrito sucked, but this was better.  It still wasn't "stuft" but had enough to be filling.  The pico de gallo at Taco Bell sucks, onions everywhere.  The texture of onions is god-awful in burritos.  You have mushy textures and all of a sudden you have the crunch of the onion which sucks ass.  Other than that it's rice and beans with cheese and steak, no sauce ever.  As with most burritos, it was fucking salty.

Fat rating: 6/10

Salt rating: 9/10

Taste rating: 6/10

No mention of the steak so far, yeah I'm aware.  For the steak taco, though, it was easiest to taste because there were no other dominant flavors.  The meat just reminds me of beef jerky but moist.  It's not exactly bad, just not real steak.  I mean, it's not like their ground beef is quality either, but I eat it because it's cheap and convenient, two key aspects of my eating decision making.

This taco had the most lettuce I've seen since Rubio's, stems have always been a pain in the ass whilst eating tacos, they will never be conquered. As you can see there is a stack of them on the right.  Fuck them.

Fat rating: 4/10

Salt rating: 6/10

Taste rating: 5.5/10

Taco Bell Taco and Chicken Gorditas

It's only appropriate I do my first review on a place I've eaten since I was a kid.  I've probably eaten over 9000 tacos, and other various taco bell ingredients in different forms.  Since the Taco Bell at school doesn't have Double Deckers  (WHY I DON'T FUCKIN KNOW, IT'S JUST A TACO LAYERED W/ BEANS AND A TORILLA, MY GOD), I got a taco and two chicken gorditas w/o sour cream.

 

The taco was just like usual, the most entry-level taco on the planet.  I may be pretentious but I don't think I'll ever be above eating these.

I was craving chicken gorditas for some reason.  The flatbread is a lot better than a standard flour tortilla, mixed with chicken, lettuce, and a good amount of cheese and tomatoes.

Since the meal wasn't too heavy, I didn't feel like shit after eating it.  I try to keep most meals at around 500-600 calories and thats probably the amount this meal was.  The amount of salt left me w/ a dry mouth as I'm typing this though. 

I'll go over the rating system, basically if the fat and salt ratings are low but the taste rating is high that's a good thing, and vice-versa.

Fat rating (how fatty the meal was): 3/10
Salt rating (how salty): 8/10
Taste rating (overall satisfaction): 8/10