Applebee's- Chicken Wonton Tacos and Asiago Steak

I went here for my birthday since my brother had dumb drumline practice so I had to find somewhere close.  Applebee's is like Chili's obviously, but for the one or two foreign readers, they're American chain restaurants. 

It was Happy Hour so I almost ordered mozzarella sticks before seeing these motherfuckers called wonton tacos.  Seeing as how this is TACOGRAPHICS, I ordered them in an instant.  Wontons - good.  Tacos - great.  Wonton Tacos?  Yes, they were delicious.  Filled mostly with grilled chicken, they were topped with some sort of cabbage mix (or it could have just been cole slaw).  Either way, I would get these again.  I ate most of them and shared the rest. The only thing bad about them was the obvious msg aftertaste. I will write a THINGS THAT CAN FOAD LIST soon enough.

Fat rating: 7/10

Salt rating: 8.5/10

Taste rating: 8.5/10

The asiago peppercorn steak dinner was one of the healthier options on the menu - you know that annoying under 550 calories menu commercial with the douchebag?  Shitty advertisement aside, I've gotten this before.  The main reason was to balance out the void of nutrition in the form of the wonton tacos.  I forgot how damn peppery the steak was, I was expecting pepper obviously, but shit.  Nothing a little A1 can't clean up. The red potatoes it came with were garlic-y and the broccoli was salted for flavor BECAUSE GOD FORBID ANY RESTAURANT NOT USE SALT ON SOMETHING. 

Fat rating: 4.5/10

Salt rating: 7/10

Taste rating: 5.5/10

Red Robin - Whiskey River BBQ Burger

My first burger review because burgers are inferior to tacos.  My brother gets this sort of burger everywhere we go, they usually look really damn good but make you feel horrible afterward from all the grease.  I got the Whisks River BBQ burger with no veggies and no mayo (because veggies on a burger don't make any sense and mayo is plain ICK).

Red Robin rules but I don't go often.  This time was sort of disappointing for some reason, maybe my taste buds were off but the burger didn't seem as godly-savory as usual.  They never put enough bbq sauce on their burgers but I was too lazy to ask for more.  The burger patty seemed like a lower quality than usual, maybe I'm wrong but meh.  It was still tasty, and red robin's fries are the way I like fries - a good amount of potato and not too oily. 

Fat rating: 7/10

Salt rating: 8/10

Taste rating: 7/10

Chili's - Chicken Enchilada Soup and Santa Fe Chicken Wrap with Loaded Mashed Potatoes

Maybe the longest Tacographics title in this blog's history - a review about my Chili's experience.  I've been going here for about 10 years.  My favorite thing here is the chicken enchilada soup, it's addicting.  I got a bowl with my entree -  it was watered down a little and didn't have enough chicken but was too busy devouring it to care. 

It was topped with cheese, crispy tortilla strips and pico de gallo.  I guess it tastes like a chicken enchilada in soup form?  I'm not really sure, I am sure it's salty - but when looking at nutrition facts it's not that bad in comparision to your average canned soup. What is surprising is the fat content, though (26g in a bowl FUUUCK).  Still, I love this soup, the best I've had (in my limited soup experience).

Fat rating: 7.5/10

Salt rating: 7.5/10

Taste rating: 9/10

I tried something new, I got a chicken wrap (no ranch).  I don't know what I was thinking, after the "Sante-Fe" disappointment that was the Rubio's BBQ Corn Nuts Taco. Meh, this was ok.  It had more quantity over quality.  The lettuce sucked ass, it was a sea of stems.  There was also some avocado, tortilla strips, corn, cheese, and tomatoes wrapped in a (I think) tomato-basil tortilla.  Very inconsistent wrap - one bite it would be mostly chicken and crunch from the tortilla strips, next it would be all avocado, etc.

Fat rating: 3.5/10 (no ranch)

Salt rating: 6/10

Taste rating: 5.5/10

I got loaded mashed potatoes as a side, creating a very odd pairing. Again, not sure my decision making was on par. I just didn't want fries and these mashed are definitely good. They try hard to not be instant-mashed potatoes with their texture and taste. There's even bits of skin mixed in so maybe they're actually real? The adding of cheese and chopped bacon significantly improved the potatoes (this is a given). I could've done without the green onions, which have no real reason to be there except for decor purposes. Overall a side-dish that I enjoy from Chili's. 

Fat rating: 7.5/10

Salt rating: 6/10

Taste rating: 6.5/10

The green gives the illusion that this is actually a healthy plate of food

Chronic Taco - Potato Taco

Chronic Taco has some decent fatty tacos because they have solid ingredients minus the meat.  However, the potato taco makes up for the shortcomings - AND...it's fried.  I know right, that's pretty much awesome and amazing and splendid and I'm running out of adjectives to describe fried tacos.  The other fried potato taco I've reviewed is from a Papa Taco's.  It was good but left a lot to be desired.

I can safely say these Chronic Taco's potato tacos are instant Tacographics all-stars.  I got cheese, shredded lettuce, tomato salsa, and guacamole stuffed inside the shell a-top the soft potato filling.

I got home and took a bite - while the shell was a little mushy in some areas (from the ride home) I still entered a tacophoria during/after each bite.  The flavors and textures together - oh god yeah.  I highly recommended these tacos - as they are both awesome and cheap (99 cents with guacamole included).  My suggestion is that you don't take them to-go if you're a fan of fresh crunchiness, though.    

      This awful picture doesn't do them justice - these are AWESOME TACOS. 

Fat rating: 6.5/10

Salt rating: 7/10

Taste rating: 9.5/10

KFC - Grilled Chicken

I had a 2 piece meal with wedges and corn.  I go to KFC sometimes after the Dentist because it's right there and I'm lazy.  Nearest available = I go.  I haven't tried their grilled chicken so I did.  It was decent for hormone-infused msg spiced chicken breast and thigh meat.  I'm not a big fan of red meat - unlike most people who say white is dry.

TACOGRAPHICS DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR SHITTY OPINIONS.

The white meat was moist and had a slight seasoning. I'm in no hurry to get it again - this is the 21st century. Bone-in chicken with skin has little worth to me.  Boneless skinless for life.

Fat rating: 3/10

Salt rating: 6.5/10

Taste rating: 6/10

Rubio's - BBQ Chicken Taco

Got this on Superb Owl Sunday before work.  Rubio's has excellent white people mexican food so my expectation was that this would be a potential Tacographics all-star.

The ingredients were in place, but to my chagrin, this taco was only a mere bench warmer.  The taco clearly had a santa-fe vibe.  From the rustic corn tortilla, to the corn, cilantro-lime tortilla strips, bbq grilled chicken and smokey honey bbq sauce - this sounded damn good on paper.

After waiting for awhile (note to self: do not eat at places that cater on the Superb Owl), I got my taco along with a chicken burrito.  My first bite:  I notice the flavor immediately.  It was a msg-bbq taste...  I was eating bbq alright...but not the bbq you'd expect.

The overwhelming crunch from the tortilla strips and the smokey honey bbq sauce had the EXACT taste and texture....  I was tasting.... BBQ Corn Nuts.  What the fuck.  Luckily the rest of the taco it wasn't as prevalent, but still.  The resonating view of this taco had already been set.

Fat rating: 3.5/10

Salt rating: 8/10

Taste rating: BBQ Corn Nuts/10

     

Domino's Pineapple Chicken/BBQ Philly Pizza DOUBLE REVIEW

Over the weekend Domino's was selling large two toppings for $5.99.  Back when they had their old (worst pizza chain) pizza I would have not given one fuck.  Since their re-vamp, however, Domino's has basically given a giant middle finger to Pizza Hut and Papa John's. 

I got two pizzas to share with my brother while our parents were out of town.  Pineapple and chicken  (the best toppings on pizza FIGHT ME) and a creation I call the "bbq philly" (bbq sauce and double philly steak meat). 

Aside from the rubbery-ish chicken (found at many chains such as Subway), this pizza was a taste explosion.  It had the sweet-salt-fatty combination not found in many foods.  The slathered-on sauce (tasted like Prego, but I think Prego is great so BACK-OFF) contained in a coat of non-greasy cheese topped with pineapple - SO GOOD.  The crust was above-average, especially the hint of garlic on the edge which added a dynamic.  With more "authentic" ingredients, this would be a 10/10 taste rating. 

Fat rating: 4.5/10

Salt rating: 8/10

Taste rating: 8.5/10

The bbq philly was not as mouth-watering, but still more than decent.  Domino's moderately sweet bbq sauce is nothing to write home about (who actually says that expression anymore?)  and the philly meat was akin to cooked roast beef (meh) but the garlic taste from the crust stood out more - when eaten in the same bite as the other ingredients - it was like a tasty bbq beef sandwich on a garlic roll. 

Fat rating: 4.5/10

Salt rating: 8/10

Taste rating: 7/10

Carl's Jr. - BBQ Chicken Tender Wrapper

Places like KFC have the Twister, McDonalds has snack-sized wraps, as does Wendys and BK (I think).  I've had them all in my life, and they range from meh to decent.  Carl's Jr. has joined the 21st century and created their own version in 3 flavors - honey mustard (nope), ranch (too fatty), and bbq.  Seeing as bbq sauce + fried chicken = god tier, I had decent expectations.   I guess I'll have to link to my chicken strips MEGA REVIEW once again, where I reviewed the strips found in this wrap (IT'S BASICALLY A TACO).

Compared to other places' shredded lettuce, this is the most "shreddy".  Still present were some ever-annoying stems. FUCK OFF STEMS, HAVING TO TAKE A FEW PRECIOUS SECONDS TO PICK YOU OUT OF MY TACOS IS SLIGHTLY ANNOYING.

My first of 3 wrappers, this one was relatively stem-free (thank you Jesus).

 

The cheese was a blend and added a tiny bit of flavor.  The main flavor came from the bbq sauce and chicken which were bold pepper-y.  All 3 of the "wrappers" I ate could have used a smidgeon more of bbq sauce but overall were already salty enough.  These white-people tacos overall exceeded my expectations, I just don't think I'll be eating 3 of them in one sitting again.  Maybe 2 with some beans and rice from the adjacent Taco Bell. 

 

Fat rating: 5/10

Salt rating: 8/10

Taste rating: 8/10

PIZZA SHOWDOWN - Little Caesar's vs. Shakey's

This past week I've had both pizza's fo' free by various means.  At regular price, though, Shakey's is about 2.5x times more expensive for a large pizza.  Is the extra $$$ worth it?  Find out in the first ever Tacographics PIZZA SHOWDOWN.

In the red corner: Little Caesar's cheese pizza.  $5 for a Large.  Yes, this is the choice for getting the most out of your Lincoln.  I would say this is the Del Taco of pizza, you can feed 2 (not fat) people for seemingly chump change.  As for the 'zza itself - just the right amount of ingredients and not greasy.  Very mild sauce and a medium-thick crust.  IT WAS PIZZA.

Fat rating: 5/10

Salt rating: 7/10

Taste rating: 6.5/10

In the blue corner: Shakey's cheese pizza.  I think 12.49 for a large (don't quote me on that).  This was a thin-style 'zza and obviously a little higher quality.  The light crispy crust version compared to their original style is a 1000x better because it's not a glorified cheese stick.  Even this version was a bit on the cheesy side, but the real difference is the sauce.  Shakey's sauce is damn good, smooth and not really like any sauce I've had; though I'm not going to sit here and claim to be a a pizza elitist. 

Fat rating: 4.5/10

Salt rating: 7.5/10

Taste rating: 7/10

Verdict:  Little Caesar's I would eat anytime for the price, Shakey's is obviously a better, more natural tasting pizza.  Bottom line: PIZZA IS PIZZA.  IT'S CHEESE, SAUCE, AND COOKED DOUGH.  IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT YOU'RE A COMMUNIST.